The “danfo” bus is one of the vehicles that transports people in Lagos.
If you live in Lagos or have been to Lagos, you should be familiar with the yellow “danfo” buses and the different experiences as a passenger. In a typical danfo, you will find different people with all kinds of character including the driver and conductor.
Some of the characters you will come across in a danfo bus.
• The ones that can sleep for Africa; No matter how short the trip is, they must sleep and rest their heads on next passenger’s shoulder. Bros, did we enter the bus together? Did Tse-tse fly bite you?
• The unofficial DJs: These ones will never use ear piece, they will be playing songs from their phones and be disturbing the peace of everyone. There are the ones that use earpiece but would still be screaming in their off tone.
• The foodies: These ones can eat 2000 Naira “food” on a 100 Naira trip. They buy all sorts of snacks and chops in traffic. Especially those ones that buy iced drinks and spill half the content on others. Must you drink “ice block” 😡 and the ones that eat boiled eggs 🤮 .
• The Aprokos: They peep into other people’s phones shamelessly, these ones will read your chat till you are almost forced to “kuku” hand them the phone to continue chatting on your behalf.
• The Preachers: These ones will sing and preach the entire trip, you either listen and participate or face your front because you don’t want to “offend” God.
• The liars: These ones have the “Linus” syndrome. They can lie!!! How can someone be in Ikeja and be telling someone on phone that they are in Okoko. These ones and lie are like this.
• The talkatives, arguers and commentators: They always have topics to discuss. They will just be shouting and moving from one topic to another, some of them with “big big grammar” and the ones that will join in the conversation from the back, Buhari is the cause of all their problems.
• The buyers: They buy everything they see on the road. Lagos traffic is their market.
• The Arrogant: These ones are always ready to insult and pour their frustration on everyone. Then you start hearing “Do you know who I am”. You don’t want to fight with them because “they know everybody”. Notice how they are almost always in jimba coat/suit.
• The troublemakers: They frustrate the driver and conductor, even after screaming that there is no change, some people will still enter with 1000 for a 50 naira trip😂.
• The gentle ones: They can’t be bothered about anything going on in the bus, they are masters at facing their fronts and minding their business.
• The Ajebos: These ones avoid all form of contact, flash their phones around until the “real owners” grab it from outside. Some of them speak unnecessary grammar to the conductor, they get to their bus stop and instead of saying the usual “owa” they keep speaking English till the driver takes them beyond their destination.
• The extra passengers: They hang at the back of the bus. No comment about these ones😑
If you ever find yourself in a danfo bus and you want to remain “sane”. Plug in your earpiece, listen to music, face your front and mind your business.
I’d love to read your danfo passengers experience but first which one are you?